Pancakes.

My absolute weakness.

Always has been. Always will be.

But the wonderful part is that they can be healthy.

I don’t care what anyone else thinks.

They can be. They can be. They can be.

Anyhoot.

I have been on a mission for quite some time now to find the perfect pancake recipe that is gluten free and made with wholesome ingredients.

And when I say perfect, what I mean is that it better not taste like cardboard, and be all rubbery and dry.

It needs to be moist and fluffy.

Otherwise you can’t call it a pancake.

Luckily, I stumbled upon this recipe right here at Bellisimo Designs Boutique Facebook Page, who by the way has a really cute shop on all things “girly”, and decided to give it a try.

Reluctantly, that is.

I have tried so many and all have failed me terribly and frankly I was getting a little ticked off.

Well you can imagine what happened when I made these.

My heart soared! Yep, it soared and skipped a beat and did a cartwheel.

You get the picture

At first, I made it with organic whole wheat flour and used Greek yogurt instead of sour cream.

They were DELICIOUS! And I’m not exxagerating. They put pancake recipes served at the greatest brunch places to utter, utter shame.

However, my naturopath keeps advising me to stay away from wheat as much as possible. Especially processed wheat.

Which means my next attempt at this recipe consisted of using gluten free flour and by gosh, by golly, how I despised just the simple thought of doing that.

But it had to be done.

So I bought a bag of millet flour and got to work.

Followed the recipe step by step but used all organic ingredients, substituted the sour cream for Greek yogurt, and added an extra 1/2 cup of milk.

To my surprise, they were fluffy and flavorful. Maybe not as moist.

Yet, with my mom in laws warm homemade blackcurrant sauce, every bite was heavenly.

This means that maybe, just maybe, I have finally discovered the perfect recipe for gluten free pancakes . . . .

Love,

Z

This little girl in pink is a tender soul.

She’s sensitive. She wears her heart on her sleeve. And she has a strong attachment to her mama.

I can still clearly remember one of my favorite moments with her when she was a tiny baby.

Each night after bath time I would clean out that itty bitty nose of hers and sure enough she never liked it. Tears would always flow.

Yet all it took to calm her down was a gentle stroke on the cheek and a soft whisper into her ear that everything will be okay.

Fast forward 5 years and not much has changed.

She still needs me by her side. She still needs to hear those words.

She needs to be reassured countless times that I will come back if I leave to a meeting, that I will pick her up if I drop her off at grandma’s, that my bedroom door will be open when she goes to bed.

And I have to be honest with you, it gets frustrating.

Especially during bed time.

She blows me kisses after kisses and says “goodnight, I love you,” again and again.

She makes me affirm and reaffirm what I will be doing while she’s asleep.

She has me give her paraphrased answers to all of her questions.

A simple kiss, goodnight, sweet dreams and walking away just does not cut it for her.

The slightest attempt to do so sends her to tears.

And most of the time I have very little patience for any of it because after a long day, ALL I want is for her to go to bed.

So I get annoyed. I get demanding. I raise my voice.

I fail to see the reality of what’s really going on.

That this isn’t just some typical nighttime battle with a 5 year old.

This is a little girl who’s got some big fears and I need to genuinely acknowledge it . . . . . .

Well,  a few days ago I really thought about it.

While driving home with a trunk full of groceries, a morbid question entered my mind.

What would happen if I died?

And like a rippling effect, a series of visuals flashed before my eyes where I found myself gripping the steering wheel and asking God to please not put my daughter through that.

Please don’t put her in that place where she receives the horrid news that mommy is gone.

As any child, she’s dependent on me but I also see it’s more than that.

I am her world. I see it written all over her face when I reach out to hug her, when I tell her I love her.

She glows. She soaks it in like a plant soaks in moisture.

To even slightly ponder the thought that all of it could be taken away from her stirs pain in my chest.

It’s one of the toughest things about being a mom. Is knowing deep, deep down inside yourself that you have no control of the hard stuff, that God is the writer and we simply have to trust Him.

I don’t think about it too often. I don’t let myself go there.

But when I do, it gets me all choked up.

Love,

Z

Here is a continuance to my obsession with grains.

I have a hot bowl every morning.

Monday through Friday.

With a tall glass of fresh squeezed apple, carrot, celery, kale and cabbage juice.

This morning, however, I decided to steer my taste buds toward buckwheat.

I couldn’t remember the last time I had any.

It’s a staple dish in my Russian culture but mostly served as a side dish with either lunch or dinner.

I, on the other hand, have made it my breakfast.

Because in my opinion, that’s what kasha is for.

And my oh my, it turned out delicious.

I simmered it in water til it all soaked up.

Drenched it with organic almond milk.

Drizzled it with maple syrup and topped it with strawberries and almonds.

Earthy. Nutty. Sweet. And crunchy.

It’s the kind of breakfast that keeps me full for hours and hours.

Here’s to endless bowls of buckwheat until my newest find.

Love,

Z

Want to know something?

I think food not only needs to be edible but also presentable.

I am well aware of how ridiculous that might sound but I can’t help it.

It’s not my fault that I was raised by a mother who didn’t just make good food but really BEAUTIFUL food.

Anyhoot, this post isn’t about that . . . .

It’s about my love and hate relationship with Whole Foods.

Since I shop there on a weekly basis, I have encountered some kind of issue with every shopping trip.

And what I have learned with each one is “check, always check, and if needed, CHECK again.”

What I mean by that is when you’re buying the meat, don’t just check the expiration date, check if it’s sealed.

When you’re buying that tied bunch of fresh dill, check through the stems to make sure there isn’t mold in the middle.

When you’re buying that package of so called fresh baked Madeleine’s, check to make sure there is no green fuzz growing all around them.

When you’re buying bagged cereal, check that there are no holes.

Most importantly, when you’re buying anything that is boxed, check the ingredient list because not everything in Whole Foods is wholesome and natural as most think it is.

This is what I have experienced for myself personally.

And even though I love going there to buy fresh herbs, bunches of Kale, lots of carrots and apples for juicing, healthy snacks for the kids, breakfast staples, and dinner essentials like their delicious spelt pasta and juicy turkey tenderloin, I hate how crowded it is, how I always have a hard time finding a parking spot, how the lines are ridiculously long, how the quality on most of the foods is compromised, and how they fail to keep things fresh.

Did I mention that at one point I saw sweet ants crawling over packaged goods at their bakery section?

Yep, it was a frightening discovery.

I’m sure not every location is like this.

I also know that it’s common sense to check and examine before you buy.

But I simply expected more from this store.

A store that gives most people a false sense of security that every item they buy is truly free of junk.

Which brings me to my last and probably most important point.

It turns out Whole Foods is stocked with genetically modified foods.

Even though they claim to be huge supporters of Non-GMO labeling and clearly state that it is their focus to provide their consumers with the highest quality products, they actually sell billions of dollars of GMO products which are greenwashed as “natural”.

That right there just stirs hopelessness and frustration.

Because not only do I want my organic purchases to be money well spent, I want to know that the choice to invest in my health is paying off, I want to know that what I am feeding my family is nothing but the best.

How can I have such assurance at a store where 2/3 of the sales are GMO contaminated???

This simply confirms my excitement about Beyond Organic, it confirms my decision to not only purchase from them but to also partner with them.

And I can’t wait til they become a fully stocked virtual farmers market.

By gosh, by golly, I can NOT wait.

If you haven’t yet, I strongly encourage you to check out this company and take advantage of the superb special they have going on right now.

Click here to learn more

Love,

Z